Agent
by Person3021
Summary: This is the story of one of the unfortunate asari commandos caught up with Matriarch Benezia during Mass Effect. Because of her loyalty to the Matriarch, Irasi is nearly killed, branded a traitor, and condemned to live the life of an outlaw. As the events of Mass Effect two and three unfold, Irasi will perhaps find that she has a greater role to play in the story of the Reaper War.
1. Chapter 1: Death

**Chapter 1-Death**

_AN: I wrote this after a long time away from the Mass Effect universe, and perhaps due to a subconscious desire to reenter it. Since playing the first game, I was enticed by the thought of contributing to such a complex story as the one woven in the series, but was unable to come up with a plot that I felt was compelling enough to justify writing. Then I had the idea for this, for a story based on the tale of one of Benezia's companions. In Mass Effect it is revealed that they weren't brainwashed, and I started wondering how it would be for one of them to survive the fight, having been convinced that they were remaining true to their Matriarch. How would the universe react to her? How would she react upon finding out what had been done by those she placed her faith in? In a lot of ways, this could become a cliche tale of redemption, but I don't think that is in the cards for Irasi. The asari commandos have never seemed like the most upstanding of galactic citizens to me, and my hope is that I might explore this aspect more as the story progresses. So please, feel free to take a look and let me know what you think of this first (and admittedly short) chapter._

"Have you ever faced an asari commando unit before? Few humans have." Irasi tensed at the words, watching as her squad mates entered the room through a small metal door. As the last to enter, it was her job to cover the exit. In only a moment, Irasi had taken in the scene. She remained calm amidst the screams of one of her companions who had been lifted into the air by a biotic attack from somewhere. _Damn it_, Irasi thought_, they weren't supposed to have any biotics_. Matriarch Benezia had told the commandos that Shepard would only have a quarian and krogan to back him up. There were only three tangoes fighting against Irasi's unit, but one of them was definitely using biotic powers. Irasi knew she had to deal with whoever it was or the whole commando squad would be torn apart. She leaned out from her cover as the vital signs of another commando went dark on her hud. She thought she could just make out the outline of Shepard's biotic, an asari by the looks of it. Irasi raised her gun and squeezed off a few shots to cover Benezia, who was fleeing to a piece of cover beside her.

The shots rebounded off the asari's armor harmlessly. Next to her, Irasi thought she hear Benezia mutter, "My own damn daughter!" For a moment, Irasi was tempted to stand up and see if she had heard right. Could it be that Liara was the biotic with Shepard? But her instincts knew better than to stand up in the middle of a firefight, and they kept her from making that mistake.

Still, Irasi knew the situation was not improving for her fellow commandos. While she and Benezia had found cover, Shepard and his companions rained fire at the only remaining asari. _Well, the only remaining patriot asari_. Whoever the biotic with Shepard was, she was obviously a traitor. Irasi tried to use her powers and pull the krogan off his feet, but something blocked her. She raised her pistol and fired, yelling at her last squadmate left, Mortrix, to run to the cover Benezia was still crouched behind. Mortrix left her own cover and sprinted toward where Irasi was standing to provide cover, but before they could meet up a well-aimed shot caught Mortrix in the knee. Irasi turned to her friend as the asari dropped, and reached out as Shepard's biotic lifted the helpless Mortrix into the air. Irasi tried to use her own biotic powers to prevent it, knowing that if she didn't help, her friend was about to become an asari pin cushion. The other asari's powers were too strong to oversome, however, and Irasi watched as Mortrix slowly rose into the air. She turned to Benezia for help, hopeful that the matriarch could lend her considerable abilities to the tug of war, but Benezia did nothing.

Determined to do more than simply watch her friend die, Irasi ran to close the gap between her and Mortrix. By the time she reached her friend, Mortrix was already floating high enough that shots from Shepard and the krogan were bouncing off of her armor. Irasi dove at Mortrix's legs and yanked. In normal gravity it would have been enough to send both of them to the floor, but the gravity on Noveria was weaker than average and Mortrix was caught in a biotic gravity well. Irasi rose with her friend, and felt the heat as dozens of shots found their marks. Mortrix's vital signs went dark and Irasi fell to the floor with her friend as Benezia cowered in the corner.

Irasi grabbed for her pistol, only to remember that she had dropped it in the desperate effort to save Mortrix. She saw it on the ground only a short meter away, but it might as well have been on the other side of the system. Irasi knew that the moment she exposed herself to Shepard and his companions, she was done for. Her instincts told her to sit tight and assess the situation, but she couldn't listen to them. The pain of losing her friend allowed Irasi to forget all of her training and do something truly stupid. Diving out from her cover, she loosed a blast of pure biotic force at the platform where Shepard was standing, and reached for her pistol as he recoiled from the blow. Irasi rose, pointed her gun at the trio above her, and fired shot after shot as she sprinted straight at the stairs that would lead her to them.

In the ten meters it took Irasi to reach the stairs, almost a dozen shots glanced off her armor. Her hud showed that it wouldn't last much longer, but she didn't care. Irasi rounded the corner and charged up the stairs. Her armor went down, and a searing pain in her shoulder told Irasi she'd been hit, but she ran on. She gathered the last of her energy and leveled one last biotic blow at Shepard. It tossed him several feet, but the krogan and biotic were barely knocked back. Irasi stared at them as she felt the familiar feelings of soul sickness overcoming her. Before she could pass out, Irasi saw the krogan aim a rather ugly shotgun at her stomach. _Not there, you fool, shoot me somewhere where I'll die quickly._


	2. Chapter 2: Rebirth

**Chapter 2-Rebirth**

_AN: I probably won't continue to update this daily, or at least I won't focus on that. What I will do is try to get at least one new chapter out each week, meaning some weeks there could be as many as seven updates or as few as one. At the pace this is at right now, I wouldn't be surprised if it ended up being a long story or series of stories, due to the span of time between the events of Mass Effect one and Mass Effect three being a little over three years. A final thought I wanted to mention is that it was pointed out that Shiala was in fact indoctrinated, and so it could be assumed that the other commandos were as well. Thinking back on it, I suppose it is possible that this was the case, but there are also grounds for believing that the commandos other than Shiala weren't indoctrinated. For one, Shiala followed Matriarch Benezia for "nearly two centuries" (according to the wikia article), and since this is around one fifth of most asari's total lifespan I think it is safe to assume that she was one of Benezia's closest acolytes. As such, she would stand apart from the other asari to Sovereign as a possible target for indoctrination. Also, the other asari obviously followed Matriarch Benezia and Saren without being indoctrinated, so there would be little reason to force that upon__ them, especially since in many cases it seems indoctrination is associated with a loss of creativity and self-awareness, which I think would be critical traits for biotic soldiers. And of course, it allows this story to exist, which isn't really evidence, but more of an "I want it to be so" argument. Anyway, thanks for reading and apologies for the excessively long author note._

Irasi vaguely felt like someone was trying to save her life. She knew she couldn't be dead, because she had an awful pain in her gut, as if she'd just eaten an entire bowl of Batarian Bakh, and she didn't think a dead asari would feel like that. Irasi's mind was hazy, too, as if someone were pumping painkillers into her. _And why would I need painkillers in the afterlife?_

No, Irasi was pretty sure she wasn't dead. Her mind wasn't working quickly enough to accurately assess her situation, but every once in a while she thought she felt horrible pain or heard doctors frantically moving about. But that made as little sense as being dead. _Why would anyone be working so hard to save me?_

* * *

When Irasi awoke, she felt the all-too-familiar press of needles on the back of her head and forearm, heard the loud beeping of machines stacked around her like towers, and knew that she truly had been saved. _But why, and by whom? _Irasi didn't have to wait long, as a doctor was brought into the room by a sudden increase in volume of the constant beeping. The man was a tall Turian, whose left arm seemed to be some sort of metal prosthesis. _I don't know much about medicine_, Irasi thought, _but shouldn't there be some sort of rule against choosing doctors who've lost limbs? _Not that she'd had any choice.

"I see you're awake," the doctor said in a conversational tone, "fascinating."

"How so?" Irasi asked, trying to keep her voice calm.

"Well you bottomed out—biotically, I mean. You should've been out of it for at least a year."

"I know what soul sickness is, doc." Irasi was starting to dislike this man, but then, she disliked most people.

"Yes, of course you would. They—that is, the justicar and her entourage—told me about you. I've never worked on a commando before."

Irasi tried to hide her surprise, but found it hard with all of the drugs coursing through her system. "Justicar? What are you talking about?"

The doctor smiled, and Irasi thought she caught a bit of pity in his expression. "Justicar Maelstra. She- Perhaps I'd better tell you the whole story. After Commander Shepard left Peak 15, the Development Corporation sent in crews to retrieve what they could. I think they were mostly after technology, but they ended up bringing back quite a few bodies, as well. You were among them. When someone noticed you were still bleeding, they brought you to me. I must say, putting you back together took some doing, and I had to give you quite a few spare parts."

"Spare parts?" Irasi asked, finally losing her calm. She struggled to sit up, but found the task impossible.

"Whoa," the doctor cautioned, grabbing Irasi's shoulder and forcing her to lie down, "no need to worry."

"Of course there is!" Irasi shouted, "You put 'spare parts' in me! Where did they even come from?"

"Well, they came from an android, actually. But before you panic, I should tell you that they're only temporary."

"Only temporary?! How could they be temporary?"

"Because you needed the parts to keep you alive, so I had to operate quickly. But I've also started cloning your lost organs, so you'll be back to normal in a year or so."

"A year!" Irasi was incredulous. A year seemed like a ridiculous length of time to have to wait.

"Yes," the doctor said impatiently, "it takes a bit of time to regrow both kidneys, a liver, half a lung, and a stomach! Not to mention the majority of your urinary tract!"

_Alright_, Irasi thought, _that's obviously a sore spot_. "Look, I don't mean to seem less than grateful. I appreciate it, I truly do. It's just, a year seems like a long time."

The doctor eyed Irasi for a few moments. "Anyway, so I put the spare parts in you and kept you alive. Of course, normally something like this is prohibitively expensive and I would have let you die rather than risk doing the operations on the off chance you had enough money to pay for them. But someone informed the Thessian Consulate of your situation and she contacted me and assured me that every expense would be paid for. So I saved your life, at double my usual fee." The doctor seemed very proud of himself.

"Alright, but where does the justicar come in?" Irasi asked.

"Well that's why the Consulate saved you. She told me they wanted you to give an account for your actions and perhaps shed some light on why Benezia followed Saren. And why you continued to follow her. The justicar is here to take you back to Thessia."

_Great. Out of the frying pan-. _Irasi figured that if she were called to account for her actions under Benezia there was only one possible result. It seemed improbable that the justicars would save her just to execute her for treason, but then again they were an inscrutable group.

A cough in the doorway alerted Irasi to a new presence, and asari standing in the doorway. The asari was obviously in very good shape, and Irasi guessed that this was Justicar Maelstra. The woman spoke with a gravel-ridden voice, "That will be all, Dr. Otho." The Turian left quickly, apparently as afraid of the justicar as Irasi was.

"Hello Irasi," Justicar Maelstra's tone was casual, "I've been waiting some time for you to awaken. My name is Maelstra."

"I'd already guessed as much," Irasi responded.

"Yes, the reports said you were clever. But they didn't mention you were a Dichromate." Maelstra reached out a hand and touched Irasi's mottled skin. "Most interesting. I would guess that it was for this reason you joined the commandos?"

Irasi bit back her initial anger. She wanted to shout _Yes, you bitch! I dealt with hate and rejection my whole life, so I finally joined the one group where that might be an asset._ But she didn't. Instead, she just stared at the justicar.

Maelstra continued talking, "It's a funny thing, dichromatism, isn't it? Nothing but an unusual pigmentation in some of the skin cells. But we attach so much to it. Why, the majority of our race would assume you were an Arda—Aha!" Maelstra had been searching around Irasi's neck, moving it to find the brand that some Thessians still emblazoned upon suspected Ardat-Yakshis. "So—It would seem you joined the commandos to get away from all of that. And it also explains why you hate the universe so much."

"I don't hate the universe!" Irasi yelled, although she tried to hold it in.

Maelstra laughed, "Really? It seems to me that only someone who hates the universe would knowingly aid those who are trying to destroy it." And with that, Maelstra left the room, leaving Irasi alone with her thoughts.

* * *

_"Why didn't you tell me she was a Dichromate?"_

_"I didn't think it was worth mentioning. It's just a genetic anomaly. I find it kind of attractive, actually. As if someone tattooed camouflage on her skin."_

_"Attractive? Please tell me you're not getting attached to this patient, doctor. I wouldn't want you to do something stupid."_

_"No no, I'm not getting attached. I'm just saying that I don't think it matters all that much if she has some patches of skin that are a different color than the others."_

_"It does matter though, doctor. Details like that can help me figure out how she got to be the way she is. Frankly, I would have expected you to comment on something like her dichromatism, if for no other reason than to say 'half of her skin is green and the rest is teal'."_

_"Alright, I'll write up a report of all the little things I noticed when I was rooting around in her gut. Would that make you happy?"_

_"Of course."_


	3. Chapter 3: Murderer

**Chapter 3-Murderer**

_AN: I suppose I don't have too much to say for this chapter. I really enjoyed it, and hopefully you will too. On a side note, if anyone knows where I can find an accurate (down to the month) timeline of events in the Mass Effect series, I would definitely appreciate it._

* * *

_Justicar,_

_ Your orders are to return the suspect to Thessia, not to wait the absurd length of time it will take the Turian doctor to make her whole again. In all likelihood the suspect will be tortured to find out the reason for her betrayal, and there is no point in waiting for a doctor to fix her body just so we can turn around and break it. That being said, if you would like you may bring the organ cultures with you, on the off chance that the suspect is acquitted of all crimes._

_ While you are on Noveria, we would appreciate it if you could retrieve the body of Matriarch Benezia. Despite her actions, she deserves the respect of a burial on her native planet. Do whatever must be done to retrieve the Matriarch's body, but be aware that there are other interested parties._

_Expecting you back in two weeks,_

_Matriarch Laconia_

* * *

Irasi struggled to regain consciousness. She'd noticed since her conversation with Maelstra that it had become harder and harder to stay awake, as if someone was upping the doses of painkillers every day. She only managed to escape sleep for a few minutes, and it was a strange sleep that clung to her. It left her mind fully active, but cut off from her body. For a while Irasi wondered if she had finally passed beyond the veil, but during her moments of consciousness she knew that was not the case.

As Irasi often did when she had nothing better to think about, she started to plan escape routes. There was no doubt in Irasi's mind that she needed to get away from the justicar before reaching Thessia, as her trial was bound to go poorly. Legal disagreements on Irasi's home planet were settled by a sort of mob rule, in which anyone who showed up to the trial had a voice, and a vote. Since those who showed up to the trials were almost universally the ones most interested in watching an asari die, it meant poor odds for anyone brought before the court. For that reason, the justicars tended to dole out punishment in private, rather than bring offenders in front of the court.

But from what Irasi had gathered during her few moments of lucidity, Justicar Maelstra was set on making her stand before the Thessia court, which left just one option: escape. She wondered if Maelstra expected her to reach this conclusion, if that was the reason they were keeping her unconscious with the drugs.

The few options Irasi had come up with were ridiculous. They all hinged on removing the needles from her head and arm, and then hoping no one noticed they'd fallen out until she could fully awaken. And then there was still the issue of pain. Irasi knew the pain would likely be horrible once the drug-induced stupor wore off, which presented yet another hurdle. Even if she could somehow get free from the needles and wait long enough that she was fully awake, the inevitable pain would complicate matters further. And even if Irasi managed to meet all of these difficulties, there was still the minor problem that she had no idea where to go once she was mobile. From what she could tell, the Justicar was travelling back to Thessia in a small frigate, which meant there wouldn't be anywhere to escape to. At least on dreadnaught, she might have hoped to hide away in the cargo hold.

Irasi figured her only option was to get outside help. _But from who?_ Apart from the machines that were her constant companions, Irasi never saw anyone in her room other than Dr. Otho and Maelstra. It was possible, although unlikely, that they were the only other passengers. Irasi dismissed asking for Maelstra's help, but thought that maybe the doctor could be persuaded to aid her escape. The next time she felt a presence in her room, she struggled harder than ever to awaken, hoping it would be Otho and not the justicar.

It was agony fighting the drugs, which would have amused Irasi had she not been the one in pain. _Given that the drugs are supposed to stop pain, why does it hurt to fight them?_ After what felt like several minutes, Irasi was able to open her eyes and glimpse the room around her. It was smaller than the room she had been in on Noveria, but very clean. She saw Otho standing beside her bed, looking at a couple of machines. "This can't be," he was muttering, "there's no way." Then he turned to Irasi, "I suppose they were correct," he added, bemused, "you are awake."

"Yes," Irasi managed to reply, "though not without some difficulty."

Dr. Otho laughed, "I can imagine. So why are you trying so hard to be awake?"

"Because I wanted—" Irasi forgot what she was about to say. _What did I want? Oh, right,_ "I wanted to ask for your help."

"My help? I daresay you've already had that, or else you would have died a few days ago."

"Not what I mean. I mean, I need your help to get off this ship." Irasi managed to open her eyes completely, and tried to reach out her hand to the doctor, who was, after all, her only hope.

Dr. Otho laughed again, "Hopping off of a ship in the middle of FTL travel tends to be hazardous for one's health."

Irasi was irritated by the obviously intentional misunderstanding, "You know what I mean, doc. I need to get away from here before we reach Thessia or else all of your work will be for nothing." She sighed, certain the appeal to Otho's good nature would fall on deaf ears. "I can pay- I can pay a lot of credits, probably a hundred times what you got to patch me up."

Dr. Otho perked up at that. "Really?" He thought about it for a moment, and then smiled, "In that case, I would ask for proof."

"Do you have a terminal nearby?" Irasi asked, surprised that the doctor's greed was great enough to risk the wrath of a justicar.

"Yes, there's one right here. Just above your head." Dr. Otho accessed the terminal.

"Alright, search for the Volus Citadel Banking Service."

Dr. Otho's hands moved as he entered the words.

"Are you at their site?"

Otho licked his lips, as if he were about to receive a tasty treat, "Yes."

"Run a query for 'Rialle Asale'."

Irasi waited for a few seconds, and then watched as Dr. Otho let out a gasp from above her. "Where did you get all that money?" he asked.

"It's a long story," Irasi replied. "But that's not important now. Right now, I need your help. If I get that, I'll give you every credit I own."

"Alright," the doctor said, suddenly compliant, "what do you need me to do?"

"I need to get out of the clutches of these drugs. We'll start there, and after that I may have one other request."

Irasi was truly surprised by Dr. Otho's ingenuity. In no time at all he had come up with a system that fed her harmless Element Zero, in place of the mind numbing drugs. Not only did the EZ make a convincing fake-opiate; it also boosted Irasi's powers. She felt strong enough to move mountains. Biotically, of course. Irasi knew her body was nowhere near perfect condition.

When Maelstra came into the room, she still had to pretend to be out cold, which was made very difficult by the machines' beeping and the constantly increasing amounts of pain. The day it took the drugs to leave Irasi's system was one of the most exhausting she had ever been through, but by the time they had finally left her she was ready to move, having chosen the plan that she felt would likely have the best chance of success.

Maelstra entered the room early in the night, probably to make sure Irasi was still alive. The justicar reached out a hand to touch the needle behind Irasi's head, not noticing the slight twitching of Irasi's eyelids. She noticed something was wrong and recoiled from Irasi's supine form, but only as a powerful blast sent her flying into one of Dr. Otho's sharp instruments.

Irasi opened her eyes and rose from the bed. By the time she was on her feet, the light had already fled from Maelstra's eyes, and Irasi couldn't help but feel sorry for the asari. She had meant to kill her jailor, certainly, but part of her remembered how revered the justicars were. After killing one, there could be no safe haven. Irasi knew that, whereas before there might have been the tiniest chance of a ruling in her favor had she gone to trial, that hope had just disappeared.

But her focus had already shifted to the other venture. The route out of the ship was open, if only she could find her way to the escape pods. Irasi stumbled out of her sick room, and prepared to incapacitate a Turian sprinting toward her.

The Turian yelled, and with a jolt Irasi realized it was Dr. Otho, "Follow me!" He turned and led the way down a small hallway, running at full speed. Irasi struggled to keep up, clutching her stomach, which burned as they made their way to what she assumed would be the escape pods. Otho took a left, and knocked over an asari. "Deal with her!" he shouted at Irasi, who used a wave of force to slam the asari's head against a metal support. They rushed on.

A few more turns, and Irasi found herself behind Otho as he settled into the cockpit of a UT-40 shuttle. She crawled into the copilot seat. "Can you break through that window?" Otho asked, pointing at the wall of glass that blocked their exit from the frigate.

"Are you crazy?" Irasi shouted, "We'll die if we leave the ship in the middle of an FTL jump!"

Otho smiled, "No we won't. Trust me, I've done it before."

Irasi grimaced and gathered her energy for one, powerful biotic blast. She concentrated on the spot where the large piece of glass met the frigate. Upon release, a biotic whirlwind tore at the window, trying to break it free from the ship. "It didn't work!" Irasi shouted in disappointment. A blast door slammed shut behind their shuttle.

"Yes it did," Dr. Otho replied calmly, "otherwise the door wouldn't have shut. Just wait, it'll tear free in a few moments."

Sure enough, the sound of glass shattering soon filled the shuttle bay as the window ripped free of the justicar's frigate. Otho started up the UT-40 and followed the wall of glass into blue and purple nothingness.


	4. Chapter 4: Pirates

**Chapter 4-Pirates**

_AN: So it's been a couple of days since my last update. Not to worry, I'm not slowing down or anything, I was just researching the asari worlds on wikia. What I found is that they are, for the most part, unexplored territory in Mass Effect, and so that is likely where Irasi will go. Also, this chapter doesn't have that much action, but should serve to explain a lot and expound upon a few of the characters. More action to come, I promise. Anyway, thank you all for reading, and please tell me what you thought of this chapter, what you think of the story so far, and anything else._

* * *

_"What kind of monsters would send a child away just because she looks different?"_

_"The same kind of monsters whose kids we receive every day. We accept them all, not because they are actually Ardat-Yakshis, but because we want to save them from a life of prejudice and hate. Many of the asari we foster this way go on to lead great lives."_

_"Really, like what?"_

_"Irasi, come over here! Irasi's been with our order for several years. She just signed up to be trained as one Matriarch Benezia's newest squad of commandos."_

_"And Benezia just accepted her? Knowing she grew up here?"_

_"Benezia was—reluctant at first. But upon our assurances that Irasi was not in fact an Ardat-Yakshi of any degree, she was open-minded enough to take the girl for training. Isn't that right, Irasi?"_

_"Yes ma'am. Matriarch Benezia was very kind, and she agreed that my—unique—skin tone would have no effect on my ability to train and function as a commando."_

* * *

Irasi woke up with the familiar feeling of painkiller induced euphoria surrounding her consciousness. _This has been happening too often recently_, she thought. _I need to stay out of trouble for a while._

She grinned when Dr. Otho entered the room, until she saw the muzzle of the pistol he was aiming at her. "Rialle Asale," he growled, "famous asari stripper from Lessus. Clever ruse, but not clever enough."

Despite herself, Irasi laughed. "Did you ever ascertain, Otho, what planet I'm from?"

"No, can't say I have." Dr. Otho cocked back the hammer on his pistol, "But I can't see how it's relevant either."

Irasi tried to raise her hands in a calming gesture, only to find that they'd been cuffed to her bed. "I'm from Lessus, Otho. Just like Rialle. I wonder how much you found out about her. Did you look into where she grew up?" Irasi was worried, but didn't let it influence her voice, which she kept steady.

Dr. Otho shook his head, and the gun dropped a little.

Irasi sighed out of relief, but hoped Otho would take it as exasperation. "Her family sent her to a monastery on Lessus that takes care of—unwanted children. She came there a few months before me."

Dr. Otho lowered his gun completely. "Alright, so I believe that maybe at one point you might have come into contact with this Rialle Asale woman, but I seriously doubt she gave you access to her accounts with the Volus on the Citadel."

"Not me specifically. I never met the asari, to be honest. But she did set up an account with the VCBS for all of the monastery's wards. For us to access in case of emergencies." Irasi tried to access her powers, worried that she would soon have to use them, only to panic once she realized how deeply her escape from the justicar's frigate had exhausted her. To prevent Dr. Otho from asking the obvious question of why Rialle would be so generous as to set up an account, fill it with credits, and give other asari access to it, Irasi went on the attack. "So how'd I get here? Before I passed out, I thought we were about to jump into space in the middle of an FTL jump."

"Ah, yes," Otho replied, smirking, "That went well. Much better than expected, actually."

"Better than expected? What did you expect?" Irasi asked, eyebrows raised.

"Well, tell you the truth I didn't know what to expect."

Irasi tried once again to raise her arms, this time to strangle the man at the foot of her bed. "What do you mean, you didn't know what to expect?! You said you'd done it before!"

Otho at least had the decency to look ashamed as he responded, "I may have stretched the truth about that. But, in a way, it's your fault, for dangling so many credits in front of my face."

Irasi inwardly cringed. This was a man who was serious about getting paid, and her lie wasn't going to hold up under scrutiny. "So you said it went better than expected," she continued, "how so?"

Dr. Otho grinned. "Well, as luck would have it the shuttle survived the rapid deceleration from FTL speeds, although not without a couple of hull breaches and the loss of a lift pad that collided with the frigate as we were making our escape. We ended up floating in the dead space near the Annos Basin."

Irasi was incredulous. "What happened then?"

"We were picked up by Salarian pirates. Just before they ambushed the justicar's frigate."

"What?" Irasi cried out in alarm, "Why?"

"Apparently they'd been told that Matriarch Benezia's body would be on board and one of their leaders figured she still has enough followers to fetch a pretty price. They were waiting for the frigate at precisely the point where it had to leave FTL to discharge its drive, and they ambushed it."

The story didn't seem to add up. Benezia's body was still on Noveria, and even if it wasn't there was no way any asari would tell pirates that it was in transit. _And even if they knew where Justicar Maelstra's frigate had jumped from and where it was headed to, how would anyone calculate where the FTL drive was going to be discharged? _"But we jumped ship before it reached the pirates, didn't we?"

Otho smiled again. Irasi hated his smile. It was oily and not at all kind, the type of smile that indicated someone ought not be trusted. "Yes, but not by much. I would guess we were travelling at about one eleventh the speed of light when you and I did our little shuttle-jump. And a good thing too, because we barely survived that. We ended up several hundred miles behind the pirates' ambush. Close enough that their radars detected us. They assumed our launch was some kind of attempt to keep the dear Matriarch's body out of pirate hands, and sent one of their cruisers our way."

"But once they got into the shuttle, they had to know that wasn't true." Irasi pointed out.

"Ah, yes—" Dr. Otho sighed. "I told our new friends about your horde of credits, and they agreed to see us to Sur'Kesh in exchange for half the bounty."

Irasi cringed. She didn't see how her situation could be worse. _I'm on a ship with a doctor who could kill me with one slip of his scalpel, surrounded by pirates who could easily overpower me, and all of them think I have access to millions of credits all because I knew the name of one asari stripper who happened to be spend her childhood on the same planet as me. _

The doctor continued, "Thank God for greed, the captain of the ship didn't tell any of the other crewmembers about your stash. Except the ones who heard us work out the deal, of course. Otherwise I'd probably have to give up even more of my share."

Irasi was having trouble sympathizing with Otho, who after all had just lost money that wasn't ever going to be his. "Well, I guess we were lucky in a lot of ways."

Dr. Otho's expression brightened considerably, "That's right! I forgot to mention the best part!"

"Oh?"

"Yeah! Remember how you killed the justicar?" Otho asked excitedly.

"Ugh, don't remind me." Irasi didn't want to think about the murder, especially as she knew that Justicar Maelstra had simply been doing her duty. She wanted to say _it wasn't my fault she put me in a situation where I had to kill her_, but the words didn't ring true.

"Well, I will remind you. After the pirates found out I was a doctor of some renown, they transferred Justicar Maelstra over here, to see if I could patch her up. But there was no way. She was dead as a Volus without an envirosuit. But I did run some blood tests, and she was a perfect match to you!"

Irasi groaned. She thought she knew where this was headed.

"So I'm happy to say that you are now one hundred percent spare part free! Although I would try to avoid doing anything too strenuous, as Justicar Maelstra's—or should I say your—" Dr. Otho paused for a minute, unsure. "Anyway, the kidney you now have was ruptured when you killed her. It's repairing itself rather nicely, but you should rest as much as possible."

Irasi felt sick. _So I not only killed a justicar, I harvested her for replacement organs. No_, she corrected herself, _Otho did that. And it looks like he enjoyed it._

Dr. Otho left the room, and Irasi wondered if he had simply forgotten to release the restraints from her hands or if he was deliberately keeping her locked in bed. _Maybe he's smarter than I give him credit for and he knows I'm lying_, she wondered, but she quickly dismissed the thought as ridiculous.


	5. Chapter 5: Ambush

**Chapter 5-Ambush**

_AN: Some action, finally. Not much, but I think this chapter is juicy enough that it doesn't need a lot of action. In fact, the pacing might be a little too fast, and I apologize if that's the case. Anyway, thanks for reading!_

* * *

"You're probably wondering why I asked you to meet with me." The captain asked.

Irasi shrugged, "Sure." She didn't really care why she had been called to the captain's quarters. Either he had figured out that she was lying and she'd have to fight her way off the ship, or he just wanted to talk. Irasi wasn't going to worry about the former when the latter was so much more likely.

"It occurred to me we hadn't been introduced," the captain continued, "I'm Parlok Sells, captain of this cruiser. And you are Irasi Nianome." Captain Sells took a quick breath, "Fascinating last name, based on asari prefixes and suffixes, translates literally to 'no name'. Not sure, have to ask; were you disowned or did you choose emancipation?"

Irasi scowled. _So this is the real reason why you wanted to talk_. "I was disowned, if you must know. My mother denied ever having given birth to me and my father—" she grinned bitterly, "I'm sure you're familiar enough with asari culture to know how often the father leaves before a child's even born."

"Yes, must have been difficult. You must have been raised by someone though, otherwise you wouldn't be here." The captain laughed, "Who raised you?"

Irasi's temper rose. She had spent her whole life avoiding memories of her past, and suddenly everyone was insisting on reliving them. "I was raised by the Matrons who run an Ardat Yakshi monastery on Lessus. They take in asari orphans."

"Ardat Yakshi? But you—No, can't have been or else Dr. would have known." For the first time in the conversation, the captain paused to think. "Irrelevant. Asked you here for different reason. Watching you and Dr., it is clear he is no friend of yours. You two haven't spoken all week. Wanted to ask; how attached are you to him?"

Irasi frowned, unsure of what Sells what hinting at. "What do you mean, how attached am I to him?"

Captain Sells' eyes widened, "Many accidents on ships, especially pirate ships. Turians could get killed in fight, or fall into engine block. Very easy. No mess. And pirates get to keep all of their money."

"I see," Irasi thought quickly, weighing the decision carefully before speaking, "and if I am very attached to Otho, then what?"

"Then Dr. doesn't fall into engine block, but after ship lands maybe Dr. still has accident. Turians on Sur'Kesh may not survive long."

_By which he means Otho will die either way._ Irasi sighed, unsure of whether she could damn Otho to death. Unlike Maelstra, who would have hunted Irasi down if she had still been alive, Otho didn't seem the murderous type. He seemed slippery, of course, but not _that_ slippery. But Irasi also had to consider the fact that Otho's death would simplify the equation. It would mean one less person cheated, once it came to light that she didn't actually have the money they thought she did. "What if I agree to withhold Otho's payment and give all of the credits in the account directly to you?" Irasi asked.

"Incentive to kill Dr. goes away, and Dr. would live." Captain Sells smiled a crooked salarian smile, and Irasi realized that's what he had wanted all along.

"Alright, then that's what I'll do." _After all, it's not like losing money that he never would have gotten anyway will hurt Otho, and this way I will have repaid him for saving my life._

"Good. Landing soon, you should get ready."

* * *

In a matter of hours, the pirate fleet was landing on Sur'Kesh. Irasi disembarked from the cruiser along with the rest of the crew, and looked around to get an idea of where she was. The size of the pirate fleet was astounding. There were five cruisers and several smaller frigates, and when the crews of each got off at the spaceport they looked like a small army. Captain Sells stood next to Irasi, keeping an eye on her and Dr. Otho. The trio, along with several muscled humans, followed the rest of the pirates into the city.

Irasi felt a pull on her arm, guiding her toward a small alleyway. "Shortcut to bank terminals," Sells explained. Even though she believed the salarian, or, rather, believed in his greed to keep her safe, Irasi was wary of the alley. She kept her eyes open as they walked, alert for any signs of danger.

In a matter of minutes they were out of the alley and in what appeared to be a very large marketplace. Their ragtag band attracted a lot of attention, especially Otho. The human pirates tensed.

Sells let go of Irasi's arm once they could see the big neon sign above several terminals. It was flashing green and gold, advertising "Bank access! Withdraw or transfer credits from your account with any Citadel Banking Committee approved bank!" Irasi stepped up to a terminal, her heartbeat racing. This was it. In a matter of moments, the pirates would know they'd been lied to. And somehow Irasi didn't think the large number of witnesses would stop them from getting revenge.

There were three fields to fill in on the terminal. Irasi typed in what bank her account was with, the name of the account-holder, and then paused. She readied her biotic strength, and asked Sells and Otho to turn away from the terminal "so you don't see me enter the password." When they did, she entered the password for her real account, hoping that the error beep that would inevitably occur might throw at least one or two of the pirates off balance. She pressed enter.

A message popped up onscreen: "Duck. Now." She did as the console commanded, as gunfire opened up from several rooftops. Salarians everywhere were screaming; some tried to hide while others just dove to the ground. In a matter of seconds the gunfire stopped, and Irasi looked up. All of the pirates were dead, but Otho, having found cover at precisely the right moment, was alright.

Otho pulled his pistol from its holster and aimed it at Irasi, "I think it goes without saying that I was aware you were trying to trick me."

Irasi was stunned, "When did you find out?"

"My dear, I always knew. Come on, you don't honestly think someone clever enough to perform open abdominal surgery would believe Rialle Asale gave you the passcode to an account with millions of credits, do you? It was a good story, but laughably obvious. The only people stupid enough—or greedy enough—to buy it were these pirates."

Irasi didn't know what to say, so she remained silent, but readied herself to deflect any shots Otho might decide to send her way.

"I'm sure you're curious about why I would go along with your plan if I knew I wouldn't get paid for it," Otho continued, "The answer is really simple: I am getting paid for it. You see, I work for a secret-peddler you may have heard of. The Shadow Broker."

Recognition flashed in Irasi's eyes. "But if the Shadow Broker was paying you to make sure I escaped—which I don't understand, by the way—then why would you wait until we were already in transit to help me?"

Otho smirked, "That is quite simple. Whereas I could have left Noveria with you in tow, and evaded that tedious justicar's grasp, she would have hunted us down. Waiting allowed me to deal with that variable. It also stops any inquiries into your whereabouts, as any asari looking into the matter will assume you were killed in the raid on the frigate just like everyone else." Dr. Otho paused, and stole a glance at a group of soldiers making their way down from the rooftops. "And lastly, it allowed the Shadow Broker to throw a group of Eclipse pirates a bone. You see, the leader of this group that captured us was growing tired of that energetic salarian captain and his greed, and he wanted to dispose of him without hurting morale. So waiting to save you meant the Shadow Broker could gain the allegiance of a sizeable pirate band and at the same time insure no one will come looking for you."

The four soldiers reached Irasi and Otho. All of them wore different armors, and no two of them were from the same species. Otho lowered his gun, but kept his gaze centered on her, "No point in threatening you anymore, anyway. What's the situation, sergeant?"

A batarian spoke, "We should get out of here, Dr. The Shadow Broker says Sur'Kesh militia is on their way to find out who's to blame for all this. They find out it's us, and it could be game over."

"Alright, so where are we headed?"

"A frigate in Hangar C, sir. It's set to jump to the Local Cluster, and then to Turian space."

"The Apien Crest?"

The batarian nodded, "Yes sir. The Shadow Broker believes that will be the best place for us to part ways."

"Alright," Dr. Otho replied, nodding to himself, "so I'm assuming we're headed to his base there?"

"That was the impression, sir."

"Well, let's go."

Irasi followed the soldiers to Hangar C, which turned out to be very close. _Whoever this Shadow Broker guy is, _she thought, _I'll be very interested to meet him. To thank him for saving my life; and to figure out why he did it._


	6. Chapter 6: Shadow Broker

**Chapter 6-Shadow Broker**

_AN: Here it is: chapter 6. Long awaited (for a whole day), and hot off the presses (relatively). The plot is finally revealed, and once again there's some more characterization. Thanks for reading!_

Irasi found Otho in the crew quarters, eating a meal of what appeared to be some kind of mush. "So," she started, "I have a few questions for you."

The doctor swallowed and looked up at her, "Alright, I figured you might. Shoot."

Irasi took a seat across from Dr. Otho. "Why did the Shadow Broker want to save me?"

"Can't say. At least, not for sure. If I were to guess, I would say he wants to talk to you about Peak 15. You were one of the only ones around just before it blew up. Could be he wants to know what happened." Otho chuckled quietly, "Or it could be some other reason. The Shadow Broker doesn't reveal his plans to people like me."

"What other reason could there possibly be?" Irasi asked.

"Well, you were an asari commando before you took a shotgun slug to the stomach. Now you're an expatriate. Maybe the Shadow Broker simply figured you would make a good agent. Or it could be something else entirely. The Shadow Broker doesn't do anything without cause."

Irasi nodded, "Ok, I think I understand what you're saying. There was probably a good reason why he saved me."

"Probably," Otho replied.

"But what about you?" Irasi asked. Otho looked perplexed by the question, so she clarified, "How long have you been working for the Shadow Broker?"

"Since he started paying me," Dr. Otho joked. "But seriously, I've been an agent for the infamous Shadow Broker for almost seven years now. He helped me get out of some trouble with the Hierarchy, and in exchange I agreed to patch up anyone he sent my way, and take on the odd spying job now and then. This mission is the first one that's required me to risk my own neck, and also the last one the Shadow Broker will send me on." Dr. Otho sighed, "After this, our partnership will be dissolved and I can go off to do—something else."

"Like what?"

"Like marry an asari and retire on the Shadow Broker's money. He's paying me enough for this mission that I'll be able to live like a prince on one of the smaller planets."

Irasi laughed, and for the first time she saw Otho as a Turian, and not just some secretive doctor who had happened to patch her up. "Does it have to be an asari?" she asked.

"Oh yeah, I have a thing for strangely colored skin."

Irasi laughed again, "I must get you all kinds of hot and bothered, then."

"Absolutely. If you weren't an Ardat Yakshi I'd definitely look into losing you before this delivery to the Shadow Broker happens."

"I'm. Not. An. Ardat. Yakshi." Irasi replied through gritted teeth. She struggled to maintain composure.

"I know that," Dr. Otho replied, "just playing around." He got up to leave, "I don't recommend the Roi-Ri, the chef assured me he knew how to make it, but it would seem he was lying."

Dr. Otho did not talk with Irasi for the rest of the voyage, and she thought she understood why. He had let her behind his defenses; not much behind them, but a little. And she had responded by losing her temper. _Not that that's my fault,_ she thought, _I bet if he went through the same things as me he'd be just as angry to be called an Ardat Yakshi. Even in jest_.

She stayed in her room, tired of all of the attention she got on the rest of the ship. The lecherous gazes from some of the crew, especially the humans, were bad enough. But worse were the looks of pity from the batarian and asari from Sur'Kesh. Irasi didn't know how much they knew about her, but it was clear they suspected something of the prejudice she had dealt with for so long. It made her want to scream_. I don't need your sympathy! I've lived long enough without it, and I ended up making more out of my life than either of you_. To avoid losing her temper, Irasi avoided those two like the plague, and when she did see them she reminded herself that she should not take what was intended as a kindness as something insulting.

* * *

The captain announced that the frigate entered orbit above Palaven, and Irasi went to one of the frigate's windows to look at the planet. Having grown up on Lessus, she was used to greenery and abundant water. _Even Sur'Kesh has forests once you get away from all the skyscrapers_, she thought.

Palaven was not green, and there was little visible water on its surface. The planet was very brown, and Irasi caught herself wondering how life could exist on this planet at all. _Surely the Turians need water to survive_.

"Aquifers," Dr. Otho said. _He must have snuck up while I was busy looking at Palaven._ Irasi worried that it was a sign that her senses, which had become so acute while she served as a commando, were slipping. When she looked at the doctor perplexedly he explained, "It's the first question most people have when they first see Palaven. 'How can anyone live on such a rocky planet?' The answer is aquifers, giant underground rivers that bubble up every few miles."

Irasi understood then, how the sprawling cities were supported. She wanted to apologize for her behavior a few nights before, but couldn't make herself do it. Instead, she just stood there with Otho while the frigate caromed toward one of the spaceports of Cipritine, the world's capital.

* * *

Apparently the ensemble of soldiers that had saved Irasi on Sur'Kesh all knew where the Shadow Broker's base in Cipritine was, for they didn't communicate directions as she and Otho followed them. They simply turned at the appropriate times, eventually ending up at an elevator. The batarian turned to Otho, "This is as far as you go." Otho nodded and turned on his heel, as the batarian waved Irasi into the elevator. The squad joined her, and one of them keyed in a code that she couldn't see.

The elevator shot downward. The trip lasted for a very long time. Irasi wondered if they were travelling all the way to the center of Palaven. It certainly felt like that was the case. Finally the elevator stopped and the doors opened, revealing what looked like a small military base. Irasi had seen a few military bases in her life, and this Shadow Broker base looked just like those, but perhaps with more technology.

"When do I get to meet the big SB?" Irasi asked.

The batarian grunted, "Right now. Follow me." He led the way down a long hallway and into a room on the right. He turned toward Irasi, who threw him a quizzical look. The room was, after all, completely empty. The batarian pointed at a metal circle on the floor, "Stand there, and then you will meet with the Shadow Broker."

Irasi did as the batarian said, and immediately a hologram of a smoky figure lit up before her. "Irasi Nianome," the figure said, "good to meet you." The figure waited, as if expecting a response.

"I'd say the same, but you haven't introduced yourself." Irasi replied, somewhat pointedly. She was resorting to insolence, as she often did when things were happening that she didn't quite understand.

The figure's eyes narrowed. Or rather, the two foggy areas the figure had instead of eyes narrowed. "It should be entirely obvious who I am."

Irasi laughed, "You are an epithet, nothing more. I would know a name, rather than address you by such a ridiculous title." She waited to see what the figure would do in response. He took an angry step forward, seemingly forgetting that holograms couldn't do any actual harm.

"Yes, you never were one for titles. And it's not hard to see why, if my dossier on you is to be believed." The hologram stepped back again. "But in this case I think it would be wise to use my title, given as to how you won't get a name, and I think of all people you have ever met I am most deserving of the respect of a title."

_Well doesn't he think highly of himself?_ Irasi mused. "We'll see about that, SB."

The figure smiled, "For now, my initials will be sufficient. And besides, I didn't fetch you here to quibble over names and epithets. What I want to discuss is something quite different."

Irasi raised her eyebrows, "Oh? Like what?"

"I want to discuss what you can do for me. I saved your life, and in such a way that you are free from retaliation for your past—deeds. Now let us discuss what you can do to repay me."

"The way I see it, the things you are attributing to yourself were all Otho's doing." Irasi knew she would have to acquiesce to the Shadow Broker's demands eventually; she was just being difficult out of habit.

The figure thought for a moment. "When an asari shoots another asari, do you blame the gun?"

"No."

"Exactly, Irasi Nianome. The gun is not to blame because without someone to fire it there would be no damage. You blame not the tool but the architect, and rightly so. You look not to proximal cause, but rather the distal cause, do you not?"

Irasi grunted; she thought she knew what he was getting at. "You think you're the real reason behind Otho's actions."

The figure laughed for a long time before responding, "Think? My dear Irasi, I know I am the architect behind Otho's choice to save you. I not only funded the whole operation, I gave him the plan."

Tired of arguing, Irasi conceded, "Alright, I can see your logic. So what do you want me to do for you?"

"I'm glad you're willing to listen. What I want from you is simple, really. You see, I have a lot of difficulty penetrating asari society, given how-closed off- your culture is. By the time asari leave their homeworlds and I can recruit them, they've already fallen into their roles. This makes it exceedingly difficult to get agents who have any power with the Republics. But you and your situation present an opportunity, one that I've never had before. I want an agent who is also a justicar. I want you to be that agent."


	7. Chapter 7: All The Universe is a Stage

**Chapter 7-All The Universe is a Stage**

_AN: This is a shorter chapter than expected, but I decided it would be best not to add on just for the sake of adding on. I never know what to say in these things, so I won't drag it out. Thanks for reading, especially to those who have followed the story thus far!_

* * *

"You want what?" Irasi asked.

The shadowy figure smirked, "I want you to become an agent for me, as the departed Justicar Maelstra."

Irasi gawked. "But—I mean, other asari would know. They'd see me and figure out I wasn't actually Maelstra."

"Why?" the Shadow Broker asked.

"Well, for one thing, I'm probably half Maelstra's age. I don't think they even make justicars as young as me. And also, there's my—skin condition. Even if an asari barely knew Maelstra, they'd know she wasn't a Dichromate."

The Shadow Broker figure disappeared, and in its place an extranet article popped up. It was titled "The Dangers of Thorian Disease: Why Exogeni Really Left Feros". The now-disembodied voice of the Shadow Broker spoke, "The disease is, of course, a fabrication. A story planted in several different locations on the extranet to make it believable. I'm guessing you can figure out what the main symptom is."

"Aging in reverse?"

"Not quite," the Shadow Broker replied, "although the article says it appears that way to others. The explanation of the symptom is that it causes skin to stretch tight across the victim's face, resulting in a younger appearance while harming skin cell integrity. Another symptom is, of course, random skin discolorations."

Irasi frowned, "But how would Maelstra—I mean how would I have caught this disease?"

The hologram figure reappeared. "Simple. Justicar Maelstra was the justicar assigned to look into the asari followers of Saren after Commander Shepard made it apparent that Saren was helping the Reapers."

"Shiala," Irasi whispered. "We left her on Feros."

"Exactly. Justicar Maelstra was sent there to interrogate Shiala, and bring her back to Thessia. She—"

"Well why didn't she?" Irasi interrupted, "Bring Shiala back to Thessia, I mean."

"Once it became apparent that Shiala had been indoctrinated—that she had been tricked by Saren's ship, Sovereign—the justicar determined that there was nothing to be gained by interrogating Shiala. Also, she had more interesting matters to look into. Like another asari who had reportedly survived the explosion of Peak 15, and who hadn't been indoctrinated by Sovereign."

Irasi was confused. "But why would a ship trick Shiala into doing as it wished? And how? And why didn't it do the same to us?"

The shadow figure sighed. "I can only speculate as to the answers to those questions. I would bet that it indoctrinated Shiala because she was an acolyte of Matriarch Benezia, not one of her soldiers. Shiala had more freedom than your fellow commandos, and so was more likely to betray Saren to the Council. But you and the other commandos were bound to Benezia by duty, and the loyalty of asari commandos is legendary. Sovereign likely didn't indoctrinate you simply because there was no reason."

Irasi wasn't satisfied, "But it doesn't sound like this indoctrination thing costs the ship at all. So why not indoctrinate us just to ensure we would be loyal?"

"The effects of indoctrination—let's just say that it makes the victim less able to think on their own. Sovereign would not do it without good reason, because of the risk of losing good soldiers. The risk of one of you leaving Benezia was less dangerous than the risk of losing a whole commando squad."

"Hmm," Irasi thought, "you still haven't explained how this ship does it."

The hologram shrugged, "True, but only because I don't know. If I did, it would make my life a lot easier." It took a deep breath, "So am I to take it that you'll accept the justicar position?"

"Do I have a choice?"

"Of course," the Shadow Broker grinned evilly, "you could tell me to go to hell and then try to fight your way out of here. Only, even if you managed to kill all five of my agents down here, you'd still need a code for the elevator. And the moment you tried to escape I'd flood the area with nitrogen, to incapacitate you so I could sell you back to the asari."

_So in other words, I don't have a choice_. "But I don't know the first thing about being a justicar."

The shadow figure laughed, "It's incredibly simple. Just act aloof and superior to everyone, and they'll assume you fill the role. You'll have Justicar Maelstra's identification, access to all her accounts, and her armor as well, once it's repaired. And no one will disrespect you by trying to do genetic scans, so there's really nothing to it."

* * *

Wearing justicar's armor felt strange. It had been customized for Maelstra, and the hips were a little too wide for Irasi's form. She was standing outside one of Cipritine's dull grey hangars, waiting for the slow-witted turian to wave her through.

After several minutes of playing with his console, the turian spoke, "Looks like you're cleared to leave. Sorry for the delay, miss—"

"Maelstra," Irasi prompted, "and the proper appellation is justicar."

The turian's eyes widened. He stammered, "O-o-oh. I'm sorry Miss Justicar. I didn't mean any disrespect."

_How do I react to that?_ Irasi wondered. She decided that Maelstra would have been irritated by the inconvenience, "Yes, well whether you meant it or not, disrespect was given." She stepped into the hangar before the turian could reply.

The _Nuevo Emepezita _was much larger than Irasi would have expected. It was a frigate, but a monstrous frigate. It was large enough that two Krogan could have lived at either end without fighting. The asari captain was standing outside the frigate's landing ramp, and she introduced herself, "Greetings, Justicar. I trust you had a pleasant stay on Palaven." She winked at Irasi and then whispered, "I've been briefed by the Shadow Broker on this mission, but my crew hasn't. So while you're on my ship, you will be Justicar Maelstra."

Irasi nodded, and the captain led the way into the _Empezita. _She pointed out Irasi's room, the second largest on the frigate. Irasi doubted she would get used to having so much space to herself. With the commandos, she had been required to fit her entire life into a footlocker, and before that she had shared her room in the Lessus Monastery with three other children.

"Well, I'll leave you to it," the captain turned to leave, "And by the way, I'm Llastra."

"How far are you going with me?" Irasi asked, unable to contain the question.

Llastra smiled, "All the way. My ship and crew have been assigned to you by the Shadow Broker. As long as he keeps paying, we'll keep flying. And from what I hear of the man, he's not in the habit of leaving debts unfulfilled."

Irasi smiled back. _You may trust him, but I never will. No one can wield that much power and still be trustworthy. _Once Llastra was gone, she collapsed on the bed. It was soft and spongy, and she quickly drifted off to sleep.


	8. Chapter 8: Matriarch Gauren

**Chapter 8: Matriarch Gauren**

_AN: Two days for this update; maybe I'm slowing down after all. On a side note, I've noticed my use of semi-colons is increasing, which could be good or bad. I liked this chapter, personally, but please tell me what you think. Oh, and thanks for reading!_

* * *

_Remember: You are on Lessus to gather information. Not to reconnect with friends from your childhood. If I catch wind of you visiting the Monastery, I'll let the Lessus republic leaders know who you really are, and you know how that will end._

_Yeah, right_. Irasi laughed to herself upon reading the SB's threat. He'd tipped his hand by telling her how hard he'd worked to get an agent inside asari-ruled space. _Does he honestly think I'm so stupid that I'm going to believe he would do anything to jeopardize my ability to gather information for him_? Irasi decided she wouldn't visit the monastery, not because of SB's threat, but rather because there was nothing there for her to come back to. She didn't want to reopen the book of those years in her past.

The Shadow Broker had sent Irasi to Lessus for reasons known only to him. She had been ordered to gather rosters of the inhabitants of each of several cities, which meant visiting several Martiarchs and playing politician.

In a few long days she had met with most of the Matriarchs on her list, and gathered the information the Shadow Broker had asked for. Only a few of the Matriarchs had been reticent to share the names of those living within the cities they cared for, but once Irasi applied pressure they caved. Irasi had to admit that she liked that aspect of being a justicar: she was in a greater position of respect than all but the highest of Matriarchs, and so when a disagreement arose it was to her will that all others bowed. As someone who had grown up with less than a sliver of respect, she appreciated the power of authority.

The next name on the list piqued Irasi's interest: Matriarch Gauren. She had grown up under Gauren's tutelage, and was worried for a moment that the other asari might recognize her. But as she continued to think about it, Irasi decided that meeting with Gauren could prove interesting. It was Gauren, after all, who had found a place for her with Benezia's commandos.

Irasi stepped off the shuttle and onto a small bridge connecting it to a grand apartment. She hardly had time to stand before the door before it slid open, revealing a teal-skinned asari. She was much too young to be Gauren, and her facial patterning was off as well.

"Justicar Maelstra, here to see Matriarch Gauren," Irasi announced.

The asari who had answered the door stared for a moment, and then turned to talk into a console by the door, "Matriarch, the justicar is here to see you." A raspy voice responded through the console speakers, "Send her up." The teal asari stepped back, allowing Irasi to enter the room, and she took a moment to admire it. The walls were mostly wooden with a small amount of metal, which made Irasi feel more like she had just stepped into the jungle than the penthouse of a skyscraper.

"Go up the stairs; it'll be the first room on your left," the asari servant prompted. Her overly helpful tone couldn't mask a twinge of hostility.

Irasi climbed up the short flight of stairs and turned crisply to her left. The door slid open to reveal a bedroom; Gauren was lying with her eyes half-open.

"Why do you disturb me?" the Matriarch asked.

"Well—" Irasi paused, unsure of how to continue. The Shadow Broker hadn't warned her of Gauren's apparent sickness. "I need your approval to requisition a list of inhabitants in Ha'Porri."

The Matriarch opened her eyes fully. "Funny name for a city, isn't it?" Gauren was being vague. In the past, that had been one of the things Irasi liked about the asari: she was always going off on tangents, and some of them turned out to be very informative. The Matriarch mistook Irasi's silence for misunderstanding, and clarified, "Ha'Porri, I mean. Oh, nevermind, you justicars have never been the kind to be interested in such things."

"But I am interested," Irasi responded, "Why is Ha'Porri a funny name for a city?"

Matriarch Gauren raised her gaze to stare at Irasi, "In one of the ancient religions, so ancient now that even its name has been forgotten, Ha'Porri was said to be matron over a group of asari who got lost on a voyage to the far side of Thessia. Once it had become clear that there was no chance of the voyagers returning home, the Gods offered Ha'Porri a deal: if she offered herself up as a sacrifice, they would help her friends find their way back. She agreed to the deal and leapt off the prow of her very own ship, landing among the rocks. As her body died, the Sister-Goddess felt so bad for Ha'Porri that she quickly fashioned a new body for the dying asari; she made it from wind and shadows. When Ha'Porri died, she entered this new body, and at first was happy, for as the wind she helped carry her friends back. But without a way to communicate or anyone to communicate with, Ha'Porri quickly became depressed. The Sister-Goddess realized that she had been mistaken to think that a mortal would be happy in a body of wind, and so she once again crafted a body for Ha'Porri; the most beautiful body she could make. But the other Gods would not let Ha'Porri inhabit it; a price must be paid, they said, for the rebirth of one who had been claimed by death. Finally, they agreed that Ha'Porri could pass into the body crafted by the Sister-Goddess, but the mark of her wind would always be upon it." Gauren stared meaningfully at Irasi, "Patches of Ha'Porri's skin were tinted white, like the wind, and the rest was left its original color. She was the first Dichromate, you see. And this myth explains how Dichromatism came to be. It is a funny name for a city because in the dialect of those who ascribed to this religion, Ha'Porri means 'wind'. Not an unfortunate name in and of itself."

Irasi gasped. The Matriarch continued, "But as the asari republics started communicating and one language became dominant, another word came to mean wind as well. 'Yakshi'." She continued, oblivious to Irasi's gaping, "And that is why some believe Dichromates are also Ardat Yakshis. Because of one tale from a long extinct religion." Matriarch Gauren smiled, "It's an incredibly rare thing, Dichromatism. Only affects one in a million; and it's recessive as well, so there are fewer and fewer Dichromates born each year."

"What are you getting at?" Irasi asked, worried at what the Matriarch seemed to be saying.

"When you run a monastery that accepts suspected Ardat Yakshis, you encounter several strange children. I have had the pleasure of knowing many Dichromates; most of them were angry little asari. After a while, I began to notice a fascinating truth: each Dichromate has a unique color combination. The second shade is always different by just _so_ much, you see." Matriarch Gauren pinched her finger and thumb close together to illustrate the point. "Why, there's one Dichromate I last saw almost a decade ago, she had teal and green skin, exactly the same shade as yours. What was her name again?" Gauren paused, a look of mock concentration on her face as she looked into Irasi's eyes.

Irasi knew the game was up; although she wanted to argue with the Matriarch she knew the effort would be futile. "Irasi Nianome," she whispered, and the Matriarch smiled.

"Last time I saw you, child," the sickly asari continued, "you were leaving with Matriarch Benezia." And then, with the authority of an elder, she demanded, "So, tell me the tale of how a Dichromate commando came to be a justicar."

* * *

Irasi told Gauren the whole story, starting with the first time she stepped onboard Sovereign and ending with her meeting with the Shadow Broker. It took the better part of the afternoon, but the Matriarch was a good listener.

By the time Irasi had finished, Gauren looked exhausted. "You killed a justicar, and now you're impersonating her?" she asked.

"Pretty much," Irasi replied, ashamed of her actions.

"I can't say I approve," Gauren took a long, ragged breath, "In fact, I can say that I do not approve. But I do see how you might have thought it necessary." The Matriarch sighed, "Maidens like you so often fall into the trap of extreme thinking; 'My world's about to end' or 'I might as well be dead'. Did you ever stop to think that maybe the courts would have absolved you of guilt?"

Irasi looked down at the white linen bedsheets, "I have, and I suppose that is why I told you everything that has happened. I suppose some part of me wants you to hug me and tell me I'm not so bad after all, like you used to."

"You want too much, child, for you ask for a lie. There was a time when I looked at a young maiden named Irasi and said to myself, "There is an asari who will become a great woman.' But I guess I was wrong."

Her heart breaking, Irasi pleaded, "What can I do to make this right?"

"Nothing, child. Besides going to Thessia to account for your actions, there is nothing you can do to make amends for your crimes. By the Goddess, I can feel their crushing weight. How you bear it I do not know."

"All I have done has been in self-defense!" Irasi screamed. "I have committed no crimes but those against others who would harm me!" Gauren's servant appeared in the doorway, drawn to the sound of Irasi's shrieking.

The Matriarch rolled away from Irasi, onto her side. "This is not true. You have put yourself in situations where others had no choice but to harm you, so that you may claim self-defense after murder. I am tired now, so leave me Irasi No-name. I will give you permission for your list, and may the Goddess have mercy."

Irasi quivered at Gauren's use of the epithet. She hadn't heard it since leaving the monastery, where it had been a symbol of shame: that her parents had hated her so much as to strip her of her family name. A tear rolled down her cheek as she left Matrirach Gauren's room.


	9. Chapter 9: Backlash

**Ch. 9-Backlash**

_AN: Alright, maybe I'm not slowing down after all. Btw, if anyone wants to review that would be great. As I'm writing this in large part to see which aspects of my writing people respond well to and which they don't like, reviews are really special to me. You can even go line by line and address how my chapters all stink, and I promise not to get offended. Anyway, thanks for reading._

* * *

The pond sparkled, deep and blue. Irasi tossed a rock in and watched the ripples slowly make their way to her feet. _Why did I come here_? She wondered. She hadn't been to her pond outside the Lessus monastery in years, and she knew the SB would take her return to the place as a direct contravention of his orders. _But maybe I don't care. Maybe I want him to tell the Republics, so that they can call me to account for what I've done_.

The conversation with Gauren had left her shaken. Irasi had taken the shuttle to this pond, which she had so often retreated to in childhood. Something about the way the sun glinted off of the water's center was calming. Llastra approached, "I just got orders from the Shadow Broker?"

Irasi turned slowly to face the captain, "Yeah?"

"Yes. He told me to bring you back to the _Empezita_."

Irasi sighed, "Wow, I figured he would freak out or something."

"He did. His exact words were, 'Get that ungrateful bitch back where she belongs.' Which I took to mean my ship."

"Get me back where I belong?" Irasi laughed sourly, "Where else would I belong than where I grew up?"

"I honestly don't know ma'am. In my dealings with the Shadow Broker, I've learned that he doesn't always think through what he's going to say when he's angry. It just slips out in a string of yelling."

_Maybe that's because he realizes that I'm the one with the real power here. He has no control over me, and he knows it_. Irasi glanced at the pond one last time, "Alright, take me to the ship. I need to remind SB of a few things." Llastra scowled, but didn't reply.

* * *

"What did I say would happen if you visited the monastery?" the Shadow Broker growled.

Irasi smirked, "You told me you'd tell the Republics about everything I've done."

"So you do remember," the Shadow Broker took a deep breath, "Then do you mind telling me why in the fuck you would disobey my orders?"

"I've never handled orders well. You know that." Irasi gritted her teeth in an attempt to calm down. Her chest felt like a firestorm; she wanted to tear something apart. She levitated a metal cup toward her; it twisted and untwisted according to her will. As a child Gauren had taught her to do that so that she didn't accidentally lash out with her powers. The memory of the Matriarch only made her angrier, and the cup crumpled up into a tiny metal ball.

"So you can destroy a piece of metal," the Shadow Broker remarked, "Do you really think I'd be scared by such a childish display."

"It wasn't for you," Irasi replied. _It's for someone else; someone who isn't here_.

"We're the only ones here, _justicar_," when the Shadow Broker said 'justicar' it was clear he was using the term pejoratively. "If that display wasn't for me, then—" Irasi interrupted him by sending the metal ball flying straight through the hologram's head. It flattened against the far wall.

"There," she sneered, "that's a display for you."

"You bitch! Why—"the hologram-figure's chest heaved, "I ought to have you brought to me so I can kill you myself, after a threat like that."

"What you ought to do is make good on your threat. But you won't." Irasi knew she was provoking the Shadow Broker beyond patience. _If I test his patience enough maybe he'll actually carry through on what he said he'd do_.

"And how do you draw that conclusion?" the expression on the hologram figure's face was contemptuous.

"Because you need me. You said yourself that it's near impossible to get an asari agent high in the system."

"So it is. But an agent like that is only valuable so long as she continues to serve me. The moment an agent disobeys, they have outlived their usefulness. Even if that agent happens to be masquerading as a justicar."

"I don't think so. If that were true we wouldn't be having this conversation."

The Shadow Broker was silent for several moments. "My question is why you would even risk getting turned over to the Republics, when we both know they'd hang you from the highest rooftop the moment they got a hold of you."

"Maybe I don't care anymore. Maybe some part of me thinks I deserve it."

"Great, so you're a fucking masochist." The shadow figure rubbed its temples. "Fine, I'll just keep you away from Lessus, and away from temptation. Like a fucking child."

_You don't understand at all_, Irasi realized. _You don't understand how I can feel bad about all I've done_. "Fine." Irasi turned on her heel and walked away from the holopad; she made her way to her room.

The sheets ruffled as she fell backward onto the bed. It groaned at the impact. She lay there, motionless, for what felt like hours. _There are only two options: either I find a way to live with myself and what I've done or I turn myself in_. In her mind, the Shadow Broker's hologram figure sat on Matriarch Gauren's bed, arguing with her. At first they both made valid points, but as Irasi drifted off the arguments became little more than gibberish. Finally they gave up on words, and the shadow figure simply tried to strangle Matriarch Gauren into submission. As she gasped for breath, the Matriarch managed to wheeze out one final sentence, "You ask for a lie."

Irasi gasped. She did not know how long the dream had lasted, and her limbs were freezing from exposure to the cold cabin air. She rolled over to face the console by her bed, which read "0132". _1:32 AM. _She wasn't tired enough to go back to sleep, so she grabbed her omnitool and sat down at the crew's common quarters. There was one other asari sitting there, eating a thin gruel. Irasi sat across from her.

"What's your name?" Irasi asked.

The crew-member started, "Rae. Rae Illena. Ma'am."

Irasi sighed, "No need for that. I'm not your CO."

"Yes, ma'am. Sorry, ma'—Oh, I'm sorry." The asari stared at Irasi. "So then what should I call you?"

"Just call me Irasi," Irasi didn't realize her mistake until she saw the wide eyes of the crewmember, "It's a—a pet name my friends used for me when I was younger."

"Alright, Miss Irasi."

"So tell me, what are you doing up at this time of night?"

"I drew the graveyard shift. For the third week in a row. I'm technically on break, but I have to get back on deck pretty soon."

"Don't they make VI's to handle functions at night?" Irasi asked.

"They do," the asari confirmed, "but Llastra insists that the ship be ready to go at all times. So somebody's gotta be up in case she wants to go somewhere."

Irasi's gaze left the other asari. "Do you mind if I ask you a question?" she asked.

"No, not at all."

"Say you had done some bad things; terrible things. Say you killed someone—several someones—but at the time you thought it was self-defense at the time."

"Ok?"

"You can get away with the murders, if you just agree to do a few favors for the person who gets you out of trouble." Irasi knew she was straying dangerously close to telling this crewmember her whole story, but she didn't care, "Would you take that deal?"

"I don't know," the asari frowned, "What kind of favors would I have to do."

"The kind of favors that could tip balances of power in the galaxy; the kind that involve treason."

The crewmember gasped, "By the Goddess! You don't mean to suggest-?"

"No, of course not. This is just a hypothetical situation. It has nothing to do with me." _If only that were true._

The other asari calmed down. "I suppose it depends."

"Depends on what?" Irasi pressed.

"On how good of an asari I am. Off the top of my head, I don't think I can say." The crewmember paused. "But I think it's clear that if I were a good asari I wouldn't take the deal no matter what. If I wasn't, I might justify taking it by saying that I would use the chance to do some good in the world. You know, to cancel out the murders."

Irasi got up to leave, "Thank you." The other asari looked like she didn't know why Irasi would thank her, but Irasi didn't explain. She just went back to her quarters and booted up the console.


	10. Chapter 10: Confession

**Chapter 10-Confession**

_AN: No author's note for this one... Although, on a totally different note, if you're an artist, please message me about participating in Project Metafiction._

* * *

_My name is Irasi Nianome, and this is my confession. I fought with the commandos under the rogue Matriarch Benezia, I murdered the justicar who was sent to hold me to account for my actions, and have been impersonating her for nearly a month after._

_ I have never done evil, or at least I would not consider myself an evil person. I am a victim of circumstance only; I had the misfortune of being born a Dichromate, you see. I would never wish such a fate on any other, for I experienced such bitterness at the hands of my fellow asari that I could no longer consider them my kinswomen. Because of my condition, I was unfairly labeled an Ardat Yakshi, sent to the Lessus monastery, and stripped of my family name._

_ It was in this monastery that I spent my formative years. From the other children I learned cruelty; experienced unkindness without end. They showed no sympathy for me, despite coming from similar backgrounds; but I do not blame them. They likely knew as little sympathy from their birth families as they showed to me. The other children were cruel, but the Matrons who ran the monastery were kind. It is they who I have to thank for the fact that I am not, as of yet, insane. I must thank one Matron in particular: Matron Gauren. She's a Matriarch now; one of the best on Lessus, from what I've seen._

_ When I had grown old enough to join the military, I expressed my desire to become a commando to Matron Gauren. After much difficulty, she found a place for me serving under Matriarch Benezia. While there were those in my squad who were just as cruel as everyone in my life has been, there were others who treated me no different than any other asari. I grew close to them, and my loyalty to Benezia was unflagging._

_ When Benezia decided to go to Saren, to try to convince him to adjust course, she offered us a choice: those who didn't want to take the risk could leave, no questions asked. Some left, but I was not about to turn my back on the one asari who had given me a chance to make something better of my life; I followed Matriarch Benezia._

_ I'm not sure when it became clear that something had changed; it just happened. The Matriarch and her closest handmaidens started saying things that didn't fit with their personalities, and they would get a hazy look in their eyes when you would talk with them. Matriarch Benezia, once so loyal to those serving under her, made Shiala (one of her acolytes) stay on Feros, where she was to become the prisoner of the beast there._

_ The Matriarch died on Noveria, or so I am told. I wish I could say that she died honorably, or that her last actions revealed some of the strength of her character, but I cannot. What good there was in her died when she became Saren's thrall; I know this because I watched my fellow commandos, the only friends I have ever known, die. She sent us against Commander Shepard, and her own daughter; they slayed us one by one. Mortrix, my best friend, was last to die. While we struggled against Shepard, Benezia cowered in a corner._

_ I should have died on Noveria, on the Peak 15 station. But I didn't. The krogan traveling with Shepard aimed a shotgun right at me and fired. My armor was gone, and my barrier had long since run out. As I said, I should have died. But a turian doctor saved me, on Thessia's dime. Soon after, a justicar showed up; Justicar Maelstra. She loaded me onto a frigate while I was still recovering from my wounds. Maelstra wanted to take me back to Thessia, to account for crimes I had committed while serving with Benezia._

_ The Matriarch placed me and my fellow commandos under Saren's command, and we committed many crimes on his say-so. I will not go into all of them here, except to say that, while many we killed were those who might have been said to have deserved it, we often blurred the lines between moral executions and cold-blooded murder. It is now clear that everything we did was to get the pieces in the right position for Saren's betrayal of the council, but at the time I thought we were simply working as sheriffs of a kind; in a part of the galaxy that was largely lawless._

_ Suffice to say, what I did at Saren's behest guaranteed me a spot under the axe. When Maelstra showed up to take me to Thessia, I knew that public sentiment was largely against those of us who had followed Benezia, and what we had done; so I did the only thing I could. I murdered the justicar, and escaped from the frigate in a UT-40 shuttle._

_ My shuttle was picked up by pirates, who had been attempting to recover the body of Matriarch Benezia (which was also onboard the justicar's frigate). They took me to Sur'Kesh, and through a series of strange events I ended up standing before the Shadow Broker. He told me that I was to become an agent for him, impersonating the justicar I had just killed._

_ I did what he asked. To my shame, I obeyed without question. For the past month I acted in a way many would describe as treasonous; I do not consider it as such. In fact, I consider this the least of my crimes. What loyalty do I owe to those who showed me nothing but cruelty, who so hated an innocent child that they stripped her of everything that ought to be a child's birthright?_

_ But I can avoid the penalty for my crimes no longer. I will stand to account; seven days from now I will arrive in the Elasa square, so that you all may judge me as you see fit. So that you, who molded me; who gave birth to this damned creature, can look upon your creation and decide whether to strike down her pitiful form._

_ As I said at the beginning, I do not consider myself an evil person. But I suppose in the end that will be for you all to decide, a week from now._

_-Ha'Porri_

* * *

It took barely fifteen minutes for the article to get posted on the most popular news sources. Irasi had sent it as a message to several asari reporters, and they made sure that it got to the right people. She had been worried that the Shadow Broker might try to keep her from getting the letter out to the public, but apparently he lacked either the desire or ability to do so.

Irasi made her way to Llastra's cabin, to inform the captain of their new destination. When she arrived, she found Llastra staring at the console on her desk, engrossed in something she was reading.

Llastra looked up at Irasi, "Is this all true?"

"Every word of it."

"Holy shit!" Llastra whispered. She smiled sympathetically, "You know the pub courts will crucify you, right?"

"Yes, that is—"Irasi sighed, "that is an inevitability."

"Then why did you do it?"

"Do what?"

"Write the letter, admit to all of those crimes. You have put yourself at the mercy of those who have none. Why?"

Irasi shrugged, "Because it was made clear to me that the only way I could atone for my crimes was to admit to them and accept whatever judgment comes."

"BS. That would only be true if the courts actually dealt out justice. Look, I read through what you did, and I don't think your crimes have earned you the kind of punishment the pub courts will deal out. I mean, sure you killed some people who may not have entirely deserved it, but you were just obeying orders. Any good soldier would have done the exact same thing."

"Maybe, but they didn't. My crimes are mine and no other's."

The captain sighed, "What I want to know is why you decided to get away from the courts the first time you were going to be brought before them, but now you are choosing to go to Elasa. By the Goddess, you killed a justicar to avoid the pub courts! And you could have avoided them again by just keeping your mouth shut. No one would have found out."

"I can't say that I have an answer for you," Irasi looked down at her palms, "I've been asking myself the same question. All I can figure is that I did this because the only person who could have commanded me to told me I should. That it was the only way to absolve myself of guilt for all the bad things I've done. Both before I met Maelstra—and after."

Captain Llastra stood, "Well, I know taking you to Elasa isn't something the Shadow Broker wants. He even sent me a message saying as much. And the businesswoman in me says I should do as he says so I can keep collecting his money. But the asari in me wants to help you out, although I'm not sure I will be helping you by doing this." She thumbed a button on her omnitool to open a line to the pilot, "Chart a course for Elasa. We have some important cargo to drop off there."

"Thank you," Irasi said.

"Don't you dare thank me. I've very likely given orders that will result in your death." The captain's chair creaked as Llastra leaned back. She rubbed her temples, "Goddess help me, I must be insane. Giving up some of the easiest credits I've ever earned just because a fake justicar's decided she's had enough of playing pretend." Llastra took a deep breath, "Look, if you need someone to testify on your side, I'll do it."

Irasi laughed, "What would you even say? 'Oh, she only shared a few secrets with SB, nothing important'?"

"No, I'd say that you didn't have to come clean. That you could've stayed undercover for as long as you wanted. That the only reason you're on trial is by choice. It won't be much, but maybe my testimony will be enough to spare you from death."

Irasi leaned over Llastra's desk to grab the captain's hand, "I thank you. Even though you say I dare not. I need to stand trial, and maybe with someone to testify for me it won't be as much of a one-sided case."

Irasi went back to her own room; she was surprised by how calm she was. _Perhaps this is how animals feel before the slaughter_. Her calm mind wasn't one born of a certainty of safety, but rather of a certainty of death. _Perhaps what causes worry_, Irasi mused, _is not the eventual outcomes we see for a situation, but the uncertainty of which outcome will come to pass._

There was no doubt in Irasi's mind about what the result of this trial would be. All that was left undecided was which method of execution the Elasans would choose.


	11. Chapter 11: Opening Statements

**Chapter 11-Opening Statements**

_AN: Thanks for reading! If you like this story, or if you don't, please leave a review or send me a message!_

* * *

Irasi trod into the Elasan square. Several justicars had to walk ahead of her, to ensure the numerous spectators remained clear of the procession. From what Irasi could see, the square was more than crowded. There were so many asari that someone had set up speakers and displays in several external locations. One of the justicars had mentioned that there would also be a live holonet stream, so that those on other planets could pass judgment as well.

During the week the _Empezita_ had been in transit, the Republic holonets had been inundated by vehement arguments on both sides of Irasi's case. The majority seemed to be in favor of killing her in the most brutal way possible, but there was small minority that believed she should just be imprisoned for life. There hadn't been any argument about guilt, and Irasi hadn't expected any. She had, after all, written a public confession of her crimes.

But the justicars were still insisting on a trial, which was bound to be tedious. Asari trials lasted as long as it took for all of the evidence to be presented, and for all of the arguments to be made; anyone who wanted to speak would be allowed their turn. As long as there was someone with something to add, the trial wouldn't be over. Only when everyone had their say and all possible evidence had been brought forward would voting begin. Irasi had heard of trials that had lasted several years, but doubted hers would take as long. Her trial was popular, to be sure, because of her ties to Benezia and Saren, as well as her very public confession. The estimates she had seen of how many asari would attend put the number around thirteen million. It wouldn't be a quick trial; that was certain. But Irasi hoped it wouldn't set any records for duration.

The justicar immediately in front of her stopped when the procession had reached the center of the Square. Irasi sat in the wooden chair designated for her as a voice boomed from in front of her; she couldn't see the speaker until the justicars moved out of the way. "Hello, my sister asari. I am Matriarch Ki'Ira Nomi, and we are assembled here to begin the proceedings against Irasi Nianome. To my left is the witness stand where anyone so inclined may bear testimony for or against the accused; if there are any who are not here in person, but wish to testify, they may submit their words in writing and I will read them." Matriarch Nomi drew a breath, "Any questions?"

The questions lasted for several hours; Irasi laughed when the questioning had finally finished. _If the questions after only three sentences take up so much time, I wonder how long this is going to last once we get into truly important matters_.

Only one of the questions, "Why did you sign your confession letter as 'Ha'Porri'?" required a response from Irasi. She cracked her neck before replying, "I liked the symbolism. If you know who Ha'Porri was, you'll understand. If not, look it up."

By the time initial questions had finished, even Matriarch Nomi looked bored. "Alright, any more questions?" she asked. "Alright, seeing none and hearing none, we can move forward to opening statements. As the accuser, justicar Rhea will be speaking for the prosecution."

The justicar Nomi had mentioned stepped forward. Irasi had heard there had been a lot of arguing over who would accuse her, and therefore speak for the case against her. As anyone who wanted to speak could, it was a largely ceremonial position, but apparently the justicars had each wanted the honor of accusing the one who had killed Maelstra.

Rhea gestured at Irasi, "The crimes of the defendant are as follows, in order of severity: thirty-two counts of unlawful assault, two counts of theft, seven counts of failing to warn the Republics of treason, one count of treason, thirteen counts of sharing confidential information with an enemy, one count of impersonating a justicar, twelve counts of murder by inaction, six counts of murder, and one count of high murder." Irasi was impressed at how the justicar could memorize so many crimes. For a second, she was tempted to mention the crimes that the justicar had either forgotten about or hadn't seen fit to mention, but she decided that would not help her case.

"As you all are no doubt aware," the justicar continued, "the penalty for all crimes at a level of impersonating a justicar and higher is a minimum of life in prison. The penalty for more than one count of murder is death, and for high murder the penalty is the same." The justicar looked at Irasi, grinning evilly, "To avoid the question of the difference between murder and high murder, I'll explain. The accused committed high murder by killing a justicar, a venerated official of the Republics. If this charge is proven, execution is the penalty. There is no room for leniency.

The prosecution will demonstrate, and you will see, how Irasi Nianome knowingly committed each of these crimes she is being accused of. We will start with the lower penalty crimes, and finish with the high murder charge. To prove our case, we will use several witnesses, as well as evidence including a letter of confession written by the accused herself..."

The speech continued for a long time, and Elasa's moon had been down for hours by the time Justicar Rhea wrapped up. Matriarch Nomi, who had started snoring, was woken up by the applause from those still in attendance. "Very good," the Matriarch said, "Well, let's adjourn for tonight. Tomorrow we will take questions on the opening speech."

The justicars escorted Irasi to a dull brown building that turned out to be the jail. They dropped her in one of the smallest cells. One of the justicars kicked Irasi, laughed, and whispered "What do you think of the case we set up?"

Irasi didn't reply. She wouldn't respond to the obvious attempt to unsettle her. Instead, she crawled onto the bunk, clutching her ribs where the justicar had kicked. In her mind, Irasi tried to organize her thoughts for her own speech.

* * *

The questions started early in the morning, and lasted until late in the afternoon. Irasi used the time to sleep, even though she knew the cameras would show it and use it to spin some kind of "look at how rude Irasi is" angle. She needed the sleep, as her justicar captors hadn't let her rest all night. Just when she had drifted off, they would come to her cell, yelling or otherwise making noise to wake her up.

Finally, the time for Irasi's speech arrived. "Now that we have concluded with questions on the prosecution's initial statements, it is time to hear from the accused," the justicar announced. Irasi stood up from the wooden chair she had been provided for the trial, "I am sure by now you have all read the letter I wrote explaining my actions. I could spend hours regaling you with a point-by-point defense of each count of which I am charged, but I will spare you that tedium. My defense is this: what I have done was done because of the society that raised me. You all are just as much to blame for my actions as I am. When a Maiden murders, is it because she is a malicious killer or because it is all she knows? I know little of kindness and much of cruelty; this is not my fault, but yours. Is it any surprise then, that when I was sent out into the world I showed it little kindness and much cruelty? As much as I am a monster guilty of numerous crimes, I am a reflection of the society that birthed me." Irasi paused, eyes surfing the crowd all about her. "If you beat a pup, does it not start to growl when anyone comes near it? If even a base animal learns the lesson of harshness from the way it is treated, how can you look at an asari and think that she is somehow different? No, I am no different. I was stripped of name, family, and given to a life where I had to learn hardness to survive. That you then turn around and judge me for that hardness is pure hypocrisy."

Irasi wanted to continue, to go on to explain how each of the crimes she had committed could be seen as self-defense. But she did not. She just sat back down on her wooden chair, a glare set on her face.

Nomi's eyes were wide, "I don't think I've ever seen a defense like that. You are aware, Miss Nianome, that 'society made me do it' is not a valid defense?" Irasi nodded. "Alright," Nomi continued, "then let's see if there are any questions for the accused." Immediately, Nomi's console lit up with what seemed like several hundreds of messages, "Yes, it would seem there are. First things first, 'You claim to know little of kindness, but in your letter you mentioned the Matriarch Gauren and a best friend named—Mortrix. Did they not show you kindness?'"

"Yes," Irasi replied, "they did. Two people out of the hundreds I have come into contact with showed me kindness. But I would be quick to mention that I only knew Mortrix for a few years, and Matriarch Gauren was but one Matron out of twenty at the monastery. What kindness I knew from them was valued, I assure you, but it was not so great as an asari must have to grow up properly."

Matrirach Nomi smiled, and for the first time in the trial, Irasi perceived that it was a kind smile, not a judgmental sneer. She read on, "Another question for you, then. 'You brought up the idea of a pup who is beaten learning to bite hands that come near, or something to that effect. You are aware that if a pup starts growling whenever anybody comes close to it, we would put it down, correct?"

Irasi smiled, "I am aware of that fact. I did not mean to imply that I should be put down like a pup because I have been taught to growl; I simply wanted to draw a connection between my situation and that of an abused pup to point out causality. I used the analogy to explain why my defense makes sense; I did not mean to imply that I should be put down. In this case, I would hope you all see that the analogy does not extend that far."

The questions continued until it was time to adjourn. When Irasi finished answering the last question for the night, Matriarch Nomi said, "Alright, we'll continue this tomorrow," and the justicars led Irasi back to her cell.


End file.
